Talk about built-in irony: the class of tricky words known as “contronyms” can mean the opposite of what you think they mean.
Amazon announced today that it has acquired the English language and plans to fully privatize the world’s predominant mode of written communication. As of 6 a.m. Eastern Daylight Time April 1, anyone writing in Amazon’s proprietary language, now known as English™, will be obligated to pay a “licensing fee” to the Seattle-based online retailer.
“Sir Tom Stoppard has written a play for BBC Radio 2 to mark the 40th anniversary of Pink Floyd’s The Dark Side of the Moon featuring Bill Nighy and Rufus Sewell.” Huh, so it looks like Stoppard still isn’t slowing down.
According to the Merriam-Webster editors, the two most “looked up” words of 2012 were “capitalism” and “socialism.” Other words in the top ten? “Bigot,” “democracy,” and “meme.”
Methionylalanylthreonylserylarginylglycylalanylserylarginylcysteinylprolylarginylaspartylisoleucylalanylasparaginylvalylmethionylglutaminylarginylleucylglutaminylaspartylglutamylglutaminylglutamylisoleucylvalylglutaminyllysylarginylthreonylphenylalanylthreonyllysyltryptophylisoleucylasparaginylserylhistidylleucylalanyllysylarginyllysylprolylprolylmethionylvalylvalylaspartylaspartylleucylphenylalanylglutamylaspartylmethionyllysylaspartylglycylvalyllysylleucylleucylalanylleucylleucylglutamylvalylleucylserylglycylglutaminyllysylleucylprolylcysteinylglutamylglutaminylglycylarginylarginylmethionyllysylarginylisoleucylhistidylalanylvalylalanylasparaginylisoleucylglycylthreonylalanylleucyllysylphenylalanylleucylglutamylglycylarginyllysylisoleucyllysylleucylvalylasparaginylisoleucylasparaginylserylthreonylaspartylisoleucylalanylaspartylglycylarginylprolylserylisoleucylvalylleucylglycylleucylmethionyltryptophylthreonylisoleucylisoleucylleucyltyrosylphenylalanylglutaminylisoleucylglutamylglutamylleucylthreonylserylasparaginylleucylprolylglutaminylleucylglutaminylserylleucylserylserylserylalanylserylserylvalylaspartylserylisoleucylvalylserylserylglutamylthreonylprolylserylprolylprolylseryllysylarginyllysylvalylthreonylthreonyllysylisoleucylglutaminylglycylasparaginylalanyllysyllysylalanylleucylleucyllysyltryptophylvalylglutaminyltyrosylthreonylalanylglycyllysylglutaminylthreonylglycylisoleucylglutamylvalyllysylaspartylphenylalanylglycyllysylserylt…
This block of text represents ~0.008% of the letters needed to spell out the English language’s longest word. You can listen to the entire thing sounded out by a real human being, too. (Disclosure: it’ll take you three hours.)
Chaucer invented a number of great words in his day.
